The Ultra-Humanite
by Uncle Sporkums
Summary: Gender-reversal Superwoman story I've written based on the Max Fleischer animated theatrical Superman shorts. In a story loosely based on the golden age Superman comic, Superwoman confronts the villainous mad genius, The Ultra-Humanite. Please note that this is my earliest written story, and I've gotten better with time.


"Up in the sky,look!" ."It's a bird!" "It's a plane!" "It's Superwoman!"

In the endless reaches of the universe,there once existed a planet called Krypton,  
a planet that burned like a green star in the distant ,civilization was far advanced and it brought forth a race of Superwomen and men,whose mental and physical powers were developed to the absolute peak of human there came a day when giant quakes threatened to destroy Krypton of the planets leading scientists,sensing the approach of doom,placed her infant daughter in a small rocket ship,and sent it hurtling in the direction of Earth just as Krypton exploded!The rocket ship sped through star-studded space,landing safely on Earth with it's precious burden: Krypton's sole survivor. A passing motorist found the uninjured child,and took her to an the years went by and the girl grew to maturity,she found that she possesed amazing physical powers! Faster than a speeding bullet! More powerful than a locomotive! Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound! The infant of Krypton is now the Woman of Steel: Superwoman! To best be in a position to use her amazing powers in a never ending battle for truth and justice,  
Superwoman has assumed the disguise of Clara Kent,a mild-mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper!  
The electric power plant stood on the outskirts of Metropolis,nobody ever paid much attention to it,until the night it suddenly shuddered and exploded!Then people cared about it when it seemed like half the city's power went out!

The next morning in the offices of the newspaper The Daily Planet,Chief Editor Perry White was looking over reports of the explosion. "Send in Kent and Lane." he instructed his secretary over the intercom.

Clara came in first,an attractive and tall yet bookish young lady dressed in a candy pink jacket and skirt with a dress shirt and green tie,her jet black hair was tightly combed backward and done up in a neat bun behind her head on her face she wore a pair of wire-thin round framed glasses. Out of the adjourning door came her friend and rival, Louis Lane. Louis was a handsome go-getter with dark brown hair combed neatly to the side,dressed smartly in a dark blue sportcoat and slacks which he neatly wore over a dress shirt with a black tie.

"Alright you two," White began in an almost parental tone. "Now I want the both of you to cover this exploding power plant buisiness,got it? The whole city's in an uproar over this thing,and I want you two to dig deep into this investigation and bring me the best dirt you can! Whether it was the work of terrorists,or even if it was just some careless goofball of an employee,I want us to have the story first before any of the other papers send their reporters snooping around the scene,so get on it!"

As the two started for Louis' car, Louis said to Clara "I don't know about you,my fair Clarybelle, but I know that "I'M" going to get a big scoop by nailing this story first!" he teased.

"Same old Louis and his wisecracks." Clara said half to herself and half aloud with a smirk as they entered the vehicle.

The balding old man in a white lab coat looked over the pictures of the annihalated power plant,then looked at the two bulky henchmen in front of him. "Excellent work, gentlemen! You shall both be handsomely rewarded as promised." The old man reached under a table and produced several sacks of money. "You are welcome to 30% of the loot from our last robbery." he said with a sinister grin.

"30%?! That's not fair,boss! When are we gonna start rakin' in the big potatoes?" One of the goons spoke up angrily.

"When you rid Metropolis of that flying nuiscence,Superwoman!" The elderly leader shouted.  
"But boss, that's impossible! No one's been able to kill that broad!" The other henchman replied nervously.  
"Incorrect, gentlemen! We have yet to test my brilliant inventions of destruction upon her!" The mad scienist said grimly!

"So,not one soul approached the plant while you were here on duty?" Louis asked night watchman Portis McLaughlin as he interviewed him,taking down notes on his writing pad.  
"Y-Yes,Th-There I was,going through my normal paces,checking that everything was running smoothly,when all of a sudden the building starts shaking like there's an earthquake, right?" The Watchman explained. "So I instinctively get away from the plant,and before you know it,the place makes like the Hindenburg!" McLaughlin concluded, throwing his arms up for dramatic effect.

"Did you hear any strange sounds prior to this?" Louis inquired deeply.

"Yeah, it was a really high pitched whine,sort of like an airplane engine. Wait a minute, ,do you think it was aliens?" said McLaughlin suspiciously.

"No, , it wasn't,don't be silly!" Louis said with good humor.

As Clara made mental notes of the story,she thought to herself, "If Louis and Pops here knew one was standing right here with them,they'd both flip their lids!"

As the two headed back to the Planet,Louis turned to Clara and said, "You know,I don't know if the chief will be satisfied with what I'm going to turn in. We still never found out what caused that explosion."

Clara smugly replied, "Who knows? Maybe it really was aliens."

Louis smiled at Clara and responded "Sure,at least it's a story!"

Suddenly, something caught Louis' eye. "Clara,look! Over at the bank!"

Clara turned her head in the bank's direction just in time to see two men with what appeared to be a Tommy Gun. However, the gun certainly didn't look like anything that had been seen before, it held a blueish tint and had no cartridge holder. Instead, there was a large, red, homely looking oblong carton atop it. The man holding the weapon let fly with his trigger finger, but instead of bullets emitting, there came a bright flash of a white unearthly light! The laser light blasted a hole into the building's side with the sound of a Howitzer shell!

Louis immediately slammed on the brakes which gave both him and Clara a violent jolt in their seats.

"Stay here,I'm phoning this in!" Louis said as he bolted from the car,and headed for the nearest phone booth.

Once inside Louis began to report the robbery to the police when he saw the reflection of two well dressed, but swarthy looking men in one of the booth's window's! Louis couldn't believe his bad luck! The robbers! A gasp tried to force it's way up Louis' throat,but he couldn't make a sound. As he turned around,the piercing, angry eyes of one of the gruff goons stared back at him.

"Alright snitch,You're coming with us!" the deep,angry voice said.

Louis put his hands up resignedly, "Okay,but please don't shoot!"

As the criminals led Louis out of the booth and into their waiting vehicle, Clara was watching the whole ordeal from Louis' car. As the men began to drive away, Clara opened the passenger side door,and looked at the receeding tail lights,a look of confidence came over her face, and with that, Clara headed for a nearby alley saying in a powerful tone of voice "This looks like a job for Superwoman!" Immediately after she had sprinted inside the alleyway, Clara removed her jacket,then stripped off her shirt and tie,she unbuttoned her skirt and let it fall,she took off her shoes,then her glasses, before undoing the bun behind her head and letting her hair down. Clara now stood revealed in a tight, dark blue outfit with red briefs,red boots,and a red cape flowing gently behind her chest,she wore a black shield-like crest with a red "S" in the middle which stood on top of her proudly jutting Clara was dressed for action in her true identity,as Superwoman! With a mighty leap,Superwoman took to the sky and began searching the ground for the car with Louis and his abductors in it.

She spotted them just as they exited a tunnel,and swooped down closer, as a hawk goes for it's prey.

One of the crooks noticed this and said "Hey Eddie,It's that Super Dame!"

"Well, shoot her down!" Eddie told his partner in crime. The thug took the future gun and aimed carefully at Superwoman,and fired! Superwoman was stunned by the blast,and fell to the ground.

"Yeah! Got her!" The thug cheered.

In the backseat,a bound blindfolded and gagged Louis thought to himself: "No! They couldn't have killed her! I'm doomed unless I can get out of this jam!"

But Louis had nothing to fear,for Superwoman was already recovering from the blast,trying to clear her head.

When Louis' blindfold was removed,he found himself in a storehouse of some sort with the two goons who captured him and an elderly man in a lab coat and a wheelchair in front of him, Strapped around the man's head was a metallic headband with long black wires running from it down to the floor, and a lime green eyeball-like lens in the center.

"Good evening, ." the old gentleman began softly. "I've seen by the contents of your wallet,that you are a reporter for the Daily Planet,a quaint publication, I've read it off and on. It must have been sweet Fate herself that had you try to phone in my associates who were busy on an errand I had sent them on,for I have needed a young man such as yourself for an experiment I have been divising for some time now. You see, Mr. Lane, you will enter the Planet offices after a brief leave of abscence,but you will not remember this,as it will be my brain inside your youthful and healthy body! Mr. Lane,I suffer from both old age and an incurable disease, from which I am slowly and painfully dying. So I will need your body to further my pursuits." At this,Louis began to wildly squirm in the chair he had been tied to. "Oh, please, , don't worry, my colleagues here have been well instructed by myself in the technique in which we shall exhange minds. It's a simple process involving this invention of mine that I have upon my forehead that transfers molecules and synapses via microwave teleportation." The man continued in a calm tone.  
"Mr. Lane,my genius has surpassed all of humanity. Therefore, I have seen it fit to refer to myself as such. I am THE ULTRA-HUMANITE!" the man concluded with a shout that echoed off the building's entire man's attitude became less easygoing. "And now that that accursed, so called Superwoman is out of the way, I will be free to advance science by any means necessary!"

Louis thought to himself in a panic, "This geezer's mad!Superwoman, please hurry!"  
Meanwhile, Superwoman has fully recovered from the blast and lept into the air, using her Super-hearing to find any clue to where Louis might be. Seperating one sound from the rest was quite a feat, but she finally mangaged to hear a soothing, elderly voice saying, "Just relax , and breathe deeply. You shall soon be in a state of pleasure."

Superwoman pinpointed the voice to a warehouse in the slums. Superwoman landed in front of the window and glanced in the window, she saw Louis strapped to an easy chair, a strange device around his forehead, next to an old man wearing the same thing, the two thugs were about to activate a large control box in the center of the room when she burst through the window in a shower of glass!

The old man turned his head with a start, shouting, "What the devil is.. Superwoman! I thought you imbeciles said that you killed her!"

"We thought we did boss!" Eddie responded fearfully,

"Well, kill her for sure this time!" The Ultra-Humanite screamed.

The thugs grabbed the guns, but Superwoman merely snatched them from their grip and snapped them both in two without any effort. Then she took the two men by their collars and threw them against the wall smashing them halfway through. She then broke Louis' bonds, took his unconcious body and threw him over her shoulder.

"Stop right there, Superwoman!" the Ultra-Humanite's voice called out.

Superwoman looked across the building to see the evil scientist with a bizarre looking helmet on his head. It resembled a human brain, but appeared to be made of crystal, with a small antannae on top that made it resemble a Pickelhaube. "For your information, Maiden of Might, this weapon is the same one that felled the power plant,It operates on brainwaves, unfortunately, it doesn't work on animate objects,but it will certainly work on this building!"

The Humanite concentrated deeply for a moment, his eyes squeezed shut with concentration. Then the building began to shake with a low rumbling sound! Plaster and wooden beams began to crumble and fall! As Superwoman lunged for the scientist, a large piece of the roof fell between them! As the building began to collapse, Superwoman was forced to forget him, and instead leaped towards the two thugs. Crooking her arm around their waists like they were a pair of dirty towels, lept out of the smashed window just as the building imploded. After dropping the crooks off at prison and dropping Louis off in front of the police station,Superwoman returned to the alley for her clothing,and after dressing herself, returned to the station.

The headlines in the Planet the next day read, "Ultra-Humanite's" Robberies Foiled! Superwoman Vanishes Yet Again!" The byline read, Story By Louis Lane.

"Take a look at that, Clarybelle, My scoop on the front page, yet again!" Louis said with pride as he read the article in the office the two shared.

"Careful Louis,you could have been listed in the obituaries, instead." Clara replied smugly.

"Well,I wasn' to Superwoman!" Louis said gratefully.

Clara turns to us, smiles heroically, pulls down her glasses and gives us a knowing wink!

THE END 


End file.
